I woke up expecting to have another wasted day: work until my shift ended, then spend the rest of the day on my phone hiding from the emptiness of my wounded spirit.

Around midday as I was preparing lunch, my phone pinged. It was my mom checking to see if I was at home. At that time I was isolating myself from the outside world and left my apartment only on Sundays to go to church or have brunch with my mom. I had no drive to do anything besides basic survival while pretending that I was okay when I did go outside. So I ignored my mom’s message. But she texted again saying she had a pineapple for me. That got my attention—the thought of the rich, candy-like sweetness of my favorite fruit. So I got myself together and waited for Mom to arrive.

She showed up a few minutes later and handed me a white plastic bag. When I opened it, I was surprised to find not only a pineapple but a journal with a pretty royal blue cover. My eyes instantly lit up, and a huge smile formed on my face. See, the last time we met for brunch I had told my mom that I planned to get a journal, so the fact that she remembered and bought one for me made me extremely happy. It was the first time in months that I felt joyful and loved. I  went back inside with a new pep in my step. I was even motivated to do a few chores and have a quiet time with God when the day wound down.

It was the first time I ever wrote to God. As simple as it might seem, it started my transformation. 

As the weeks passed, God gave me the strength to move away from the life choices that had put me in the dark place I was in. It was a slow movement, but boy did I move. I was motivated to keep going to church, I started to pray more, started to worship and read the Word more, joined two youth groups and met some awesome people, and I began serving at church. I became a new person, finally able to see the beauty in life and in myself.

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